|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
The SeaThe Sea
It calls to me at night—the sea
Crashing waves belt out
Their peaceful song
Sandy shores along murky depths
My cold heart warms to the soothing chorus
Calming the roaring inside my soul
Forever, LoveDarkness swirls from past regrets
But new hope shines through the murky depths
as I try to muster the courage to be
The kind of woman you need me to be
My heart is raw and open
Bleeding on the floor
But with you it’s like it’s not so broken
At least until the pain restores
But love, you should know I want to
Be that kind of lady
The kind that can make it through
Your love it fills me
Restoring me and stitching
Together the tattered remains once more
Without you, love, I fear
I would not even be
Much less here
So love, my life and my love
Will be forever yours
This I swear
AvoidanceI've avoided these words for months...
Because you are not even worth the pain seared words I write...
But I am slave to my heart so I have no choice
But lay them out before you
Look at what you did to me
I hate that now my words are stuck in my chest
Lodged and hard to swallow like a sticky sweet gob of caramel
I hate that now I can't write without pain
Without remembering you
Now my lungs fill with acid at the thought of you and my
Heart burns with the need for air and I can't breathe
Can't move, can't think, can't dream
Without the reminder that you existed
And totally ripped my beautiful heart into a million pieces
"You're not worth the distance anymore"
Well you're not worth the words I am writing
The pain I am feeling.
You are not worth the tears I cried or the lies I told
You are the one who left me
Broken and bleeding and
I hate you
Hate you for what you did to me
What was once beautiful and vibrant is now broken
And ugly shattered and irreplaceable
I HATE what you made me and
LuminescenceLost in deep pools of gray blue moonlight
The wind chill reaches for me
But cannot go beyond this warmth
The light pours through the trees
Brushing my skin breathing life into
Me once again
The forest floor damp beneath me
Seeps through my socks into my bones
But yet I feel warm
The moonlight trapped within my pores
From the night before
This light fills me
Every time I think or dream
That I carry with me despite
This harsh chill
I’m not afraid of winter’s sting or
The night’s darkness reaching for me again and again
I know your light will fade soon enough
And then I’ll seek you out once again
I promise I won’t leave you alone
Your light ever glowing
Keeping my heart shining bright
Colors of ChangeAs I stand outside the dew covered window pane,
And look into a world I will never be a part of again.
I try to remember a happier time.
A time where warm hugs and mugs of hot chocolate
Would be waiting
After a cold day outside raking leaves and forming them into piles to jump in.
But that time is over.
And I am out here in the cold,
Never to feel that warmth again
Trapped among the bare trees their branches
Stripped of color and their bark hanging loose
My hand reaches for the latch that would bring me,
Closer to you,
But my fingers pass right through
And they tremble for I have forgotten.
I am nothing more than a chilly breeze on a cold autumn’s night.
Those times of warmth and joy are over,
So I lay here covered in a thin layer of frost.
And wait for the change to be over
So I too may disappear,
In hopes of seeing you one last time
I breathe onto my palm and
Touch the frost covered glass…
Shedding SkinEvery morning I watch Mommy put on her face
She tells me the world likes her this way
But every evening when no one is around
And Mommy thinks I’m safe and sound in bed
I watch her peal back
The layers she built with care
So no one would see what’s really under there
Her skin is all battered worn and thin
Her eyes sunken in her head
Hair hangs loose
Teeth stained yellow
The woman that looks back
Cannot possibly be
The mother who takes care of me
She gives a small sob
And then turns around
To see my pale little face broken with a frown
Her head hangs in shame
And I rush to her side
Saying, “Mommy you don’t have to hide”
I know those layers protects you from the pain
But with me
Here and now
You don’t have to be ashamed
You don’t need to pretend
In here were safe from the
World’s prying eyes
In here we don’t have to hide
WavesI cannot control them
When they come for me
I fear I cannot tell you why
They are a mystery
These feelings they roil, twist and churn
Until my insides there is nothing left
The ruins they leave in their wake
Are nothing compared to the ache
In my heart
Caused by so many confusing waves
That you leave behind
They tell me I can stop it
But how can I?
When you are the one to have caused this
You did this
You broke me
And I cannot help these feelings I am having
Because in the end
I am only a victim
To my own heart’s waves
MonsterIt’s ugly everyone hates it
So they hide it away and hope to
Praying it goes away
But what they don’t know is that
It sits there scheming
Up new ways to wreak havoc
New ways to hurt
Those fools didn't think the monster
Their hated eyes boring into its flesh
Searing their pain and sins into him
What they don’t know is they created him
With their greed, lies and hate
Turning him into something grotesque
It won’t matter if you lie about it because
In the end
The monster within
Know the real you
Unable to loveMy love was pure
I only wanted
But my heart
Because my love
Like a piece of garbage
And now I'm unable
Because the shreds
Of my shattered soul
MathematicsI am but the sum of my
F L A W S;
a network of
S C A R S
a disaster of
D R E A M S
a shield of
B O N E S
C A L C U L A T I O N
a void of
to the girl i lose my words aroundi have been meaning to tell you for years:
i think you’re beautiful. i have
seen nothing on earth that holds a candle
to the ocean you carry inside your body.
it spills over your edges sometimes, like
a rain shower around you, blurring your penciled-in
lines until there is nothing left of you but your natural
cliffs, valleys, and deserts.
i like that.
i have never met someone who is, somehow,
a sea and a storm at the same time.
maybe i never will again.
maybe you are the only one
who gathers clouds on her forehead
like a promise, or feels the push and pull of the tide
with her every step.
you are beautiful, honestly.
you are honest, beautifully.
it is in the way you talk, the way you hold ice
on your tongue but forget to use it—
you always forget to use it, i don’t think
you know how.
to be truthful, i’m afraid of your smile
and how it breaks over me, how it pulls
me like a whirlpool down, how it pushes me
like a current back to the surface. i’m afraid of
now i see the stars.there was a time when i
couldn't catch my breath whenever i
thought about you , (crippled lungs and-
boy, you hit me like an asteroid,
there's a crater on my chest now that I can't ever seem to fill,
oceans of my tears cried on
nights when you couldn't be there to sing me to sleep.
thirty two poemless days after you joined the constellations,
i walked out into the yard and howled to the empty sky,
for a moment i was Gaea, rivers running down my cheeks,
weighted to the ground and
buried in myself, but
where there is no light there are no shadows, and
sometimes, i wonder if i miss me.
yes, i do.
i may not see the moon, but
Abuse Is Sometimes NecessaryPush and pull at her long hair, topple her to the solid ground,
elbow her sharply in the raw gut, shove her harshly around.
Scratch him in the pale face, punch him in the broken jaw,
do anything necessary to him that's considered breaking the law.
And when she cries because you've punched her, let her be,
and observe her when she returns to her habitual smoking.
When she passes out next day, because she's drunken too much booze,
slap her in the face once more, though many would consider it abuse.
When he can hardly walk because he thinks he's high in the clouds,
rip the needle out of his arm, and with your nails, slash him across the sweaty brow.
Grab them and shake them till their battered and bruised,
tear at their heart, scream in their ears until you've reached the point of verbal abuse.
And when she falls into your chest, and he collapses to the ground,
pull them closely, and whisper, “We can turn this all around.”
And rehab is a necessity for all of you, because you'v
i am made of nights like theseativan boy, you cannot empty out this skull -
not with a pen nor with a bullet. you can
be my hallowed head(case) for spitting out
words like teeth; oh, but i will only love you
when you're weary. i will keep crows caged
between your lungs like veins, like palpitations.
i will rot you through bones & car radios,
but i will never get (you) out of your skin.
ScienceI am more than my
F L A W S;
a masterpiece of
S C A R S
a delicacy of
D R E A M S
a sculpture of
B O N E S
R E A C T I O N
a well of
Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You)Good (Great, Greater, Greatest, You)
I hope the title caught your eye,
because this is about you.
Many of us speak in superlatives
and ambiguous language.
In imagery-laden text masquerading
underneath double entendres
keeping us from a part of the truth.
But purple streaks and red bands,
harp strings and soft hands
don't begin to explain
the love I have for you.
So I lay these words down
simple in its vulnerability,
blemished and raw in its purity.
The term lissome fits you in many ways,
but not necessarily it its textbook form.
I speak on the part that is not readily seen
but what is easily most cogent.
Your consciousness' cognizance
is graceful in the way
you fold one syllable over
another, supple in its meaning
that can take many forms
going from idle lies
to how we idolize hollow eyes
and uncovered hip bones.
Elegance is an understatement,
but I refuse to speak in cliche superlatives.
I speak honestly
but not with exaggerated grandeur.
Because your immediate app
A broken heartI promised myself I'll never fall in love
Whenever I fall in love I feel renewed and happy
But like a drug
Once everything finishes
I'm crying, depressed and the wreckage of my heart
I always end up feeling worse
I want to find someone that is special
But I'm afraid to suffer again
I'm afraid of losing another person
Do not want to suffer
Do not make me suffer, do not lie to me
Do not hurt me, no more
I will not hold on to people who only sink me
I'll be free and live with have left
A cold and lonely spirit.
Seeking SolaceSeeking Solace
It is peace and bliss
So much so I can never ask for it
Ice and fire two opposites that I desire
I sought it out all my life
Going round and round again
Never sure which way to turn
And when I realize how alone I really I am I cannot help but
Be thankful for the silence
This never ending dance makes me wonder
Does anyone truly wish for solace?
Keep in Touch!