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The SeaThe Sea
It calls to me at night—the sea
Crashing waves belt out
Their peaceful song
Sandy shores along murky depths
My cold heart warms to the soothing chorus
Calming the roaring inside my soul
Forever, LoveDarkness swirls from past regrets
But new hope shines through the murky depths
as I try to muster the courage to be
The kind of woman you need me to be
My heart is raw and open
Bleeding on the floor
But with you it’s like it’s not so broken
At least until the pain restores
But love, you should know I want to
Be that kind of lady
The kind that can make it through
Your love it fills me
Restoring me and stitching
Together the tattered remains once more
Without you, love, I fear
I would not even be
Much less here
So love, my life and my love
Will be forever yours
This I swear
AvoidanceI've avoided these words for months...
Because you are not even worth the pain seared words I write...
But I am slave to my heart so I have no choice
But lay them out before you
Look at what you did to me
I hate that now my words are stuck in my chest
Lodged and hard to swallow like a sticky sweet gob of caramel
I hate that now I can't write without pain
Without remembering you
Now my lungs fill with acid at the thought of you and my
Heart burns with the need for air and I can't breathe
Can't move, can't think, can't dream
Without the reminder that you existed
And totally ripped my beautiful heart into a million pieces
"You're not worth the distance anymore"
Well you're not worth the words I am writing
The pain I am feeling.
You are not worth the tears I cried or the lies I told
You are the one who left me
Broken and bleeding and
I hate you
Hate you for what you did to me
What was once beautiful and vibrant is now broken
And ugly shattered and irreplaceable
I HATE what you made me and
LuminescenceLost in deep pools of gray blue moonlight
The wind chill reaches for me
But cannot go beyond this warmth
The light pours through the trees
Brushing my skin breathing life into
Me once again
The forest floor damp beneath me
Seeps through my socks into my bones
But yet I feel warm
The moonlight trapped within my pores
From the night before
This light fills me
Every time I think or dream
That I carry with me despite
This harsh chill
I’m not afraid of winter’s sting or
The night’s darkness reaching for me again and again
I know your light will fade soon enough
And then I’ll seek you out once again
I promise I won’t leave you alone
Your light ever glowing
Keeping my heart shining bright
Colors of ChangeAs I stand outside the dew covered window pane,
And look into a world I will never be a part of again.
I try to remember a happier time.
A time where warm hugs and mugs of hot chocolate
Would be waiting
After a cold day outside raking leaves and forming them into piles to jump in.
But that time is over.
And I am out here in the cold,
Never to feel that warmth again
Trapped among the bare trees their branches
Stripped of color and their bark hanging loose
My hand reaches for the latch that would bring me,
Closer to you,
But my fingers pass right through
And they tremble for I have forgotten.
I am nothing more than a chilly breeze on a cold autumn’s night.
Those times of warmth and joy are over,
So I lay here covered in a thin layer of frost.
And wait for the change to be over
So I too may disappear,
In hopes of seeing you one last time
I breathe onto my palm and
Touch the frost covered glass…
Shedding SkinEvery morning I watch Mommy put on her face
She tells me the world likes her this way
But every evening when no one is around
And Mommy thinks I’m safe and sound in bed
I watch her peal back
The layers she built with care
So no one would see what’s really under there
Her skin is all battered worn and thin
Her eyes sunken in her head
Hair hangs loose
Teeth stained yellow
The woman that looks back
Cannot possibly be
The mother who takes care of me
She gives a small sob
And then turns around
To see my pale little face broken with a frown
Her head hangs in shame
And I rush to her side
Saying, “Mommy you don’t have to hide”
I know those layers protects you from the pain
But with me
Here and now
You don’t have to be ashamed
You don’t need to pretend
In here were safe from the
World’s prying eyes
In here we don’t have to hide
WavesI cannot control them
When they come for me
I fear I cannot tell you why
They are a mystery
These feelings they roil, twist and churn
Until my insides there is nothing left
The ruins they leave in their wake
Are nothing compared to the ache
In my heart
Caused by so many confusing waves
That you leave behind
They tell me I can stop it
But how can I?
When you are the one to have caused this
You did this
You broke me
And I cannot help these feelings I am having
Because in the end
I am only a victim
To my own heart’s waves
MonsterIt’s ugly everyone hates it
So they hide it away and hope to
Praying it goes away
But what they don’t know is that
It sits there scheming
Up new ways to wreak havoc
New ways to hurt
Those fools didn't think the monster
Their hated eyes boring into its flesh
Searing their pain and sins into him
What they don’t know is they created him
With their greed, lies and hate
Turning him into something grotesque
It won’t matter if you lie about it because
In the end
The monster within
Know the real you
A message to the brokenYou drown yourself
in liquid sorrows,
letting the salty mess
burn your wounds,
and the sadness
to drip in your mouth,
consuming your words
and you say
you deserve the pain,
but I want to dry your face,
and whisper in your ear
how the clouds cry too,
while they hold such beauty,
and so do you.
It's Okay to be ImperfectThe moon
Stand Against SuicideI know the pain is perhaps unbearable,
But darling, please put down the blade.
Release your emotions through tears and smiles,
Rather than dreading these days.
Do it for the little girl, whose mother can’t be there,
Or for the boy whose father drank too much.
For the boy who can’t sit in elementary school,
Because the bruises from Daddy hurt to touch.
For the teenage girl lying face down in her bed,
Thinking, why can’t it all be done?
For the elderly man looking up at the stars,
Counting the days one by one.
Do it for the children who wonder, does it end?
For the ones who feel left on their own.
For the ones who think, maybe it wouldn’t be so hard
If I didn’t feel so left alone.
And finally, do it for one other person,
The person in front of these words.
Because you’ll never know how it gets better
When focusing on pain and hurt.
Live one more day, dear, for them and for you,
And I swear to you, problems will fade.
I know, for right now, it’s p
I Thought I Needed FeminismI thought I needed feminism, when I was a little girl.
And I am very sad to admit, that this wasn't very long ago.
I thought when he held the door open for me, that he was making a big mistake.
That he was being a pompous ass, and he took my strength for a fake.
And when he offered to pay my tab, I still called him an ass.
Because I thought he assumed I was poor, and below middle class.
Or when his hard work earned him a promotion,
yet I did nothing, and the boss' ignorance to promote me, I believed was a sexist notion.
My friend really wanted feminism when she found her ex-dead drunk,
removed his clothes, and without his consent, had a pleasurable fuck.
When her parents bust into the room unexpected that night,
she said he raped her, and he was arrested without so much as a fight.
Perhaps feminism was there when I walked out into the street in pure nudity,
and shouted the my neighbors “You have no right to judge me!”
I didn't care about the children who were standing in th
These Faded KeysOf all the keys I click
As we speak each day,
It's the back arrow
That's faded most
These white letters
Would surely tell you,
I reply to everything -
But the key reading "enter"
Will be the one to explain
Why it still looks new
I want you to know
Just how much I care,
But I don't want to be close
Out of the fear of losing you
But please remember:
I dedicate these words to you,
Sharing them to the world
Rather than clicking away
At the faded key ~
Echoes we are like
in the middle
but not quite
what we truly
DethronedI have created Eden, through the strokes of my pen,
But it was made of promises, and angels
That were too fragile to hold the weight of our sins.
You were my goddess, on a throne made of dreams.
Which you were probably
They didn't glimmer and shine
like the diamonds decorating your rings.
They were the hopes of a man
So madly in love, but you poured poison into his heart
And so he rotted, each time you gifted him with a kiss.
Seeking SolaceSeeking Solace
It is peace and bliss
So much so I can never ask for it
Ice and fire two opposites that I desire
I sought it out all my life
Going round and round again
Never sure which way to turn
And when I realize how alone I really I am I cannot help but
Be thankful for the silence
This never ending dance makes me wonder
Does anyone truly wish for solace?
Bo.When Lindsay was born, Bo was there. Standing beside her mother, he was the first thing she ever saw. But he was not her father; her father stood on the other side.
Bo was there until the very moment she died.
The sun shone bright through the windows of her pink-laden room. She loved pink. And black.
“Because Bo is black,” she’d told her parents.
Her imaginary friend, they soon concluded.
“Bo is all black,” she described one night as her father tucked her in, “His skin and his hair and everything. He doesn’t talk a lot.”
Her father frowned.
“He sounds scary.”
“He’s not,” she insisted.
Bo sat on the bed and said nothing.
Her father kissed her good night and turned out the light.
“Why can’t Dad see you?” she asked.
“Are you real?”
“Are you real?” he replied.
“How do you know?”
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